Koi baat nahi

— Praggapti Ghosh

 

The 21st-century world seems to find a solution for every problem, every situation, every event which puts you down, “koi baat nahi” or to say “it’s okay” the statements which seem to be used often no matter what the situation is.

This universal statement can be applied everywhere.  You share with your friend that you are having a very bad day, and just when you are about to share more, there comes a “koi baat nahi” slapping you right at your face, telling you to shut up, informing you that it does not matter, your emotions should be controlled by you yourself. You hear your colleague is sharing about a fight at her home, and you say “koi baat nahi” at the very precise moment she is about to lose it. This can go on and on in any situation you can think of.

The work of “koi baat nahi” here is to nullify the emotions as if the emotions do not exist. However, in reality, we can’t ignore the fact, all the emotions the positive ones like happiness and wonder and the negative ones like anger and disgust are normal and universal. There is nothing wrong with having them. There is nothing wrong in wanting to share them either. Sometimes all it needs to let go is one good ear to listen.

So, next time someone shares something with you, consciously remember that “baat hai” which means that “it matters” and try to replace the phrase with “I am listening to you” and “I am here for you”

And if it appears to you that you can’t be available fully to listen to someone accept it and let the person know there is nothing wrong in accepting your own emotions too, in the long run, it is much better than nullifying the emotions.